Individual RelationshipTherapy

Attachment, Dating and Love Relationships

When individuals are not given a consistent example of love in their early life, it can be very difficult to love another unconditionally as well as accepting and receiving love. Many lead their life through a false self that shows up in relationships and it craves affection, recognition, acceptance yet they deeply believe they don't deserve it. This can lead to an urgent felt sense of needing to control, manipulate or even trap the person in order to get our needs met. This ironically creates what we fear most - abandonment. 

If you yearn for companionship that feels nourishing, but continue to find yourself defined by your past, you may benefit from professional help. It is very normal to fear secure attached relationships - and this goes for the single, the married for many years, and the one's in "complicated" relationships. This is because unless we heal unresolved complex trauma, it is very difficult to let abandonment and shame not run the show.

Healing entails seeing the other person(s) as someone we learn to love rather than possess.

In our time together, I'll support you to:

- learn to talk about feelings while taking responsibility for them
- learn to allow the other person to be who and where they are at with ease
- cope when difficulty arises
- learn to listen empathetically, not fix
- learn to ask for what we need, rather than expect the other to mind-read

With a new developed sense of trust, you may feel more confident in taking that leap of faith and committing fully to the other person(s).

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